Choose wisely

 

A friend already asked ‘That means everything is fixed in life? and we do not have a choice to choose what we want?’

 

Well, we have chose what we what to achieve in life e.g. perfect health, family relationship, helping others as a career, financial abundance,… But the journey to reach your goals can be a smooth sail, can be an uneven road, or interesting, painful, joyful…

 

Fortunetellers can give you accurate answers about your past as you have already set footprint on your journey. They predict your course of actions based on what you have done in the past. And that is just a prediction and some of us tend to follow what have been told to them as their unconscious mind picked up.

 

One can achieve the same objective with ease and another with sorrow e.g. we could see in our school days, some of our classmates were so stressed up before exams, and some of them were seems effortless. Those selves pressured students might not necessary scored better and vice versa.

 

You know your objectives through your feelings and / or doing things that you enjoy doing. You may be a mother, a teacher, or someone who make money easily, or someone likes to help others… those attitude, character, identity (human) are the sum that matching to achieve the blueprint of your life objectives.

 

Of course all of us want to achieve our goals successfully with joy. This is the part that some of us have doubt. You need to balance between realistic and non-realistic. E.g. one may love to open a pet shop at this moment. However, there might be many concerned friends advises not to, due to the economic situation… the person may started to have doubt of his/her own ability of success. That’s how the unconscious mind works (unconscious mind does not process negativity and attracts to reality from what you have in mind). That’s how a person has a rough sail in his/her career if the unconscious mind picked up the negativity. This is one of the barriers makes a person to have an undesirable result.

 

E.g. I grew up in a family that anything happened to us, it was always our own fault. Therefore, I thought that being bullied was normal at school as at home and work. Thus, I grew up with so much fear and seek for answers. Until I understand how my mind works and what life is all about, I started to choose to have joy and be at presence. I have changed and so as everything around me changed (perception is projection). It seems life has just started after 30 over years.

 

You can do and be anything that you want in life. Listen to your heart to choose wisely. All of us need NOT to go through a winding road; there is always an easy, smooth express way with beautiful scenery along. You can always make yourself ‘the lucky one’ as long as you have faith in yourself.

 

Time

In welcoming the new year of 2009, some of us have new year resolutions…

 

Almost all of us like to use time as a measurement of achievement. Time is precious, that’s what people say. However, keeping time alive is unpleasant. The past is just a memory and it gives us an identity (ego).

 

The future is an illusion. Some of us take it as a salvation. But future will come to us as present moment. Remember, unconscious mind has no time dimension.

 

In life, we learned through experience, not so much by words. That’s why we have internship, experiments, practical work,… Many times, parents or friends share with us incidences that they have experienced, we can only understand but lack of the feeling to the situation. Until we face the similar circumstances, we then realized ‘Ah!! That’s how it feels like!’.

 

A few feedbacks that I do not understand them or even expect me to solve issues for them. The question is ‘Have you learned the lessons of what you are facing now?’ If you have, you would already have the solutions to your issues. Solving an issue for others is easy, however, you have asked to go through situations to learn. Thus, if lessons not learn yet the issue solved, similar problem will re-appear until the day you learn and know how to solve the issue by yourself. What others can do for you is to give you guidance (map) when you are ready to accept the truth and move forward (drive a bus).

 

Some readers are curious, things seems come so easy to me. Yes, I am here sharing with you of what I am teaching myself, I should say, remembering things (unconscious mind knows everything). Of course, many teaching comes from my personal experience (within) and I cannot open a book to type out a summary to share with you.

 

Appreciate every single moment that you have (now), whether it is good or bad, positive or negative, fair or unfair,… life has always planned for you to evolve, to your final destination (home). All the events that happen in life have a blueprint that you have asked for (the journey) to experience and to learn (who you are).

 

There are times that you may come to circumstances that you do not know how to move forward, yet in years later, you have a clearer picture of why did it happen. When you realized it, you may say ‘I am glad…’ Turn every moment into a golden opportunity and all there is.

 

E.g. I have a friend who shared with me about his frustration dropped out story during college, years later, as in now, he is sharing his dropped out experience with his psychology students (parents) and he is doing very well.

 

Everyone has a story to tell, but let the past rest and move forward from here, RIGHT NOW…

 

Mind

Occasionally, we encounter stranger who speaks aloud to him/herself. We tend to make a detour to avoid any contact to the person. We normally label them as mentally ill. At the same time, we wish that all these people are taken care of by locking them up in a special place, rather then running free and ‘seems’ endanger others on the street.

 

We too never stop thinking and speaking to ourselves. The only difference is we do not speak out loud and it is socially acceptable. We are not much of the difference from them, because we too having images and stories run wild in our mind, that produces worries, phobia, fear, anxiety, jealousy… negative emotions…

 

Almost all of us are doing it and it has become a norm to use our mind to think. To some, the images or conversations in their mind even controlling or preventing them to move forward easily. They are either living in the dark shadow of the past and/or shifting the darkness in the past into the future. Some of them even like to experience what others claimed to be ‘bad luck’ in their mind.

 

Remember, your unconscious mind does not process negativity and it attracts what you have in mind. I suggest you surrender yourself to silence and listen to your heart as much as possible. That would lead you to a smooth sail in life…

 

Winners

In our society, we tend to compare and compete among ourselves. Since young, our parents compared us with other children regarding our height, weight, result score, activities that we did,… as we grow up, we like to ask others about their age and school they came from, that is to see what they have achieved compare to ourselves or people around us. That make us never stop judging and looking for the flaws of others for a glimpse of triumph and happiness. Unconsciously, we focus on our ‘lack’ than what we have.

 

Competitions supposed to be friendly motivation for participants to achieve better results. However, due to our ego mind hunger for winning, sometimes we subtly making others look ugly in order for us to out shine the rest. As a result, we fear that we are not good enough and threaten by others’ out standing performances.

 

The truth is, all of us are winners as long as we could feel joy within. Just like some could be contented and settled with less. Simple gift could make them happy for days. They do not need to be the smartest, richest or nicest person in town yet they are always at peace. As mentioned, all answers are come from within and they are the true winners.

 

Meditation is one of the answers…

 

 

Limitations

Recently, I met a new friend, Jensen Siaw, who shared briefly with me about his past and how he came about to achieve his successful career as a Motivational Trainer, Speaker, Life Coach, Certified NLP Practitioner & Coach, Certified Hypnotherapist, Radio Co-Host, & Founder of SPEAK For Life. Through the conversation with him, I can see from his eyes that he is enjoying things that he does and his past has not preventing him from what he wants to be today. To find out more, please go to www.SPEAK-For-Life.com Thank you for knowing you and I understand about myself even better.

 

Many of us create our own limitations and take life ‘too’ serious… and I learned a great lesson from reading an article about Miss Laurentia Tan, who won medals at the Paralympic Games this year.  Her motto in life is ‘Carpe Diem’ (Latin) ‘Seize the day’

 

‘You never know where things may lead. Go ahead and follow your dreams. Focus on the things you enjoy and which make you happy. Life is too short to do otherwise.’ Laurentia Tan (BA (Honours) degree in Hospitality Management & Tourism from Oxford Brookes University and now preparing for the World Equestrian Games in 2010 in Kentucky, United States, and London’s Paralympics in 2012)

 

Miss Laurentia Tan, who is physical handicaps, cerebral palsy and profound deafness ‘Although I was the only physically disabled pupil in the unit, I was never left out of sports activities… I have always striven to do things that my able-bodied friends can do, though without moments of frustration… So it was practice, practice, practice – and laughter,… aim for the moon… and even if you miss, you will land among the stars.’

 

Trust Yourself

I just learned from a friend that it is only ‘one step’ ahead is the life of your fantasy. However, the most frustrating part is, many of us are stuck in this one step before and it seems like forever.

 

We have this idealism in us that the new business which you starting up with must have a perfect company name, hence, you are waiting for the inspiration, your child must be super intelligent, therefore attending classes non stop, or your partner must fulfilled a long list of ideal criteria that it is close to impossible to find one… Some may say you are a perfectionist, but you say you are not with reasons behind.

 

We may have the urge to do something strongly, yet we give ourselves reasons to distract it. Or you are not convinced that you are actually already doing it. It is because you want to see more physical ‘results’ to prove to yourself. It is like everyone says your child is excellent, yet you think s/he is not good enough.

 

Patient is the word to describe as we are moving from imperfection to perfection.  In addition, as you focus on the negative side of the issue, that has made you feel stagnant. In fact, you are moving forward with ease. You just want it ‘fast’…

 

Yes, we can achieve our goal fast. If there are lessons for us to learn, we will experience more humps and turbulence along the journey. In contrast, if you can trust yourself to go with the flow, things will come at ease and pleasure…

 

Trusts that you are on the right tract and things may not be necessarily have a fix rules and procedure to go about. Let your emotion be your guide and trust yourself that ALL IS WELL. 

 

Uncertainty

 

Uncertainty is one of the human’s fear. Fear is one of the human’s major negative emotions. Uncertainty happens especially in the midst of economy down turn and seems everything slows down… Many people start to speculate ‘There will be retrenchment,… pay cut,…’

 

There are many things that are uncertain, just that we always ‘make it’ certain. When you were much younger, you thought you would be happily married at the age of 30 with a successful career, you did not expect your new job would be so demanding before you join the company, some of you did not think that it is such a pain to handle your in laws until you married to your partner, or you did not foresee that the new business you invested in was not an ideal one… But before you commit all these marriage, career, or businesses, you said you have studied every aspect and very certain that this is what you wanted.

 

Human does not like uncertainty, but life or events are so unpredictable, why not just enjoy to the fullest and let it unfold by itself. In times you may find surprises along the way. Live through every moment even if it is hardest time rather than avoiding it and you may have to face it again if lessons have not learnt. Take whatever comes easy and you will find yourself with so much freedom and joy within.

 

Remember, we will not be given tasks that we cannot handle. All the answers are within, therefore, have the confidence to trust yourself.

 

Vibration

22 October 2008

In life, it is not how much hard work you have tried or how much effort that you have put in. It is so much about the vibration.  

Imagine that you are a 100kg weight person. As you walk down the street, you see an ice cream store. You wanted so much just to enjoy an ice cream under the hot sun. Yet you tell yourself ‘Hey, I am over weight and I should not be having any dessert at all.’ You walk away with a feeling of deprivation. However, you can walk away from an ice cream store for 1000 times and you still can’t beat the slim and sexy girl next door, who is older than you, doesn’t do exercise as much as you do and even eat more than you! On top of that, she gets to have an ice cream during every lunch time! Well, people could explain that she has a higher metabolic rate than you do or luckier…

Have you ever ponder? In whatever religion that you believe in, why your god made some of us more fortunate than others? What make these lucky people so special? And yes, we create all the reality happen to us, everything, every incident without exception…

Come back to the example of the 100kg person. S/he might be thinking:

‘I am fat and I hate myself when I look into the mirror ’

‘I don’t deserve any tasty food’

‘I can’t even have a bite of ice cream’

‘I put on weight easily and I must stay in control.’

How do you feel as you read these phrases?

 

The slim sexy girl may be thinking:

‘Oh, I love ice cream and so good that I get to enjoy it every day.’

‘How wonderful it is for me to enjoy my life to the fullest.’

‘I am one of the luckiest person in this world.’

‘I love being myself.’

How do you feel as you read these phrases? 

 

The difference is the vibration. What is vibration???

You know how the radio frequency works. When you tune the radio into 98.8, you can never receive 95.3 on the 98.8. You want to listen to 95.3, you got to tune to 95.3! Just that!

Vibration is using your emotion to be your guide and aligned with your unconscious mind. When you are aligned with your unconscious mind, you feel JOY in side.

Life supposed to be very easy. It is because for many generations above us did not understand the theory. Now we understand it clearly, change our mindset, practice it and it works for us. Life is very fair. What we think about, we attract it.

It is just like successful business wo/men using their instinct or intuition to make major decisions. We know that all major decisions are without full resources/information available. They go according to their feelings, to recruit the right person to work for them, to do investment, to know whether a new business associate can be trusted, …

Practice, align and trust your unconscious mind, you will always be guided to the next level in life. 

Be like a creel

10 October 2008

In life, we learn through experiences. Sometimes you may find situations that you do not want then only you know what you want. If you aware of that, you will find tune and work towards what you really want. Just like, you seek for happiness when you are not happy.

The unwanted situations may seem pressing at that point in time. Once you have gone through them and learnt, you will find yourself better off at handling or even choose other wise at similar junctions in the future. Therefore, let situations go through you with zero resistance like a creel. No matter what happen in situations (in or out from the river), the creel remains light.

Resistance happens when a person avoid to face an unpleasant issue. That is when the negative emotions exist and it is harmful to our body. It has so much resistance when you press a bucket into the river and it is heavy while we are pulling it up. Resistance occurs when a person is thinking about the unwanted future and omitting present.

Stay at present moment and face situations as much as you can. You will realize your capability by taking one step at a time with key to answers. Remember, we never be given anything that we cannot handle in life.

 

Believing is seeing

26 September 2008

Sometimes we may wonder, why successful people are so calm and focus on things that they set out to do, and stubbornly never give up. Compare to those who are in the comfort zone or always say ‘in deep trouble’, or in the denial to have a slight thought of changing of mind.

We are moving from imperfection to perfection. We never stop creating desires. Whether you like it or not, we create things that happen to us. Our experiences, our daily activities, and good or bad life situations…we create all that. The universe never gets tired in responding to our requests.

It is just like a friend of mine explained to me:

You walk into a restaurant, you order your favorite dish ‘Chicken wings’. You only need to order once to the waiter, and you know ‘chicken wings’ will be served to your table. You do not need to wonder how the chef prepares the dish in the kitchen. And you know that you will enjoy the dish soon. And this is how successful people operate.

In contrast, some of them are not 100% congruent even after they have ordered the dish. They look around on how others are enjoying their dishes, and thinking to have beefsteak instead. Some even walk by the kitchen to peep how the chef or kitchen looks like. Their favorite dish ‘chicken wings’ has been served to the table and yet they still have a slight moment of thinking ‘beefsteak might be better’. That’s what happens to those who claim that they always fail.

These people are full of worries. Their minds run wild on how they fail even the incident has not arrived, they have phrases like ‘How others look at me…’, ‘In case…’, ‘What if…’, ‘But…’ ‘I should…’ … despite of having sun shines all the time!! They are focusing on the lacks and failures. And remember, the unconscious mind does not process negatives.

In contrast, some people are making big buck even during the economy downturn. They know it is always coming to them. It is like an architect look at a space, have an image in mind, than draft out a plan and eventually a magnificent building standing at the space!

‘Believing is seeing’ is how the universe works. When you have a moment of thought, ONLY focus on things that you want specifically. Faithfully and patiently, your dream will come true.

Present moment

15 September 2008

From the last e-mail, we learned that we never stop creating desires. During the journey, you want to do only the right things in your life, wishing having only the beautiful pictures in your mind, yet it seems the world does not always revolve together with you, sometimes you feel like you are against the currents. You may even ask yourself ‘How do I move forward from here?’ You feel that your whole world has collapsed into pieces that can never be the same.

In the past, we have faced some challenges in life, like first time driving alone to town, first time making a presentation, … some even greater challenges like having financial difficulties, broken relationships or issues that you thought you were having a hard time to resolve. Yet, when we look back, though we may feel the negative emotions (sadness, guilt, anger,…), we are glad that it’s over and now you life has fall in place, may be better or may be worse, importantly, we learned our lessons and we do not want to make the same mistake again.

Whether you believe in god, light, sun or yourself, we are given only challenges that we can handle. It is just like in the past, the moment when we faced a challenge, we thought that was the greatest of all in our life, yet we got over it and moved on.

Same thing, when you face a challenge right now, take it easy and knowing that you will get over it. Needless to be too concerned neither to be too stress. When you are having stress, there is where you want to be in an ideal future and yet, you are at the present. Therefore, practice to be at the present moment fully, so that you will find yourself cannot hold any negative emotion which will lead to have better health and making better decisions.

How do I be fully at the present moment?

Now think of an issue, you may find that you have images in mind with negative emotion. Now, FOCUS YOUR BREATHING. E.g. breathe in…, breathe out,…. breathe in, … breathe out,… while having the issue in mind. You may find it is rather hard to even think of the issue. That is where you are at PRESENT MOMENT.

We never stop creating...

05 September 2008

Some of us have this philosophy in life ‘That will be good, only if I have ….’ I have heard so many ‘If I have won a lottery. Wow!!! I will be very happy’, ‘If I have my own home, that’s the most wonderful thing that I have ever get.’ ‘If all my workers are working perfectly, I can have peace of mind.’ They are not so convinced that everything is in place, right now. They put their happiness into the future, and also spend most of their time thinking of the future (sometimes with worries). In fact, their ‘happiness’ keeps sliding away, even further into the future and they always chasing it from the present moment.

Believe that our desires never stop and that is the process of our creation. Remember when we got our first cell phone; we wanted the latest and the most expensive in the shop. Now cell phone has become so common and then we want to have a plasma TV at home, then a car, then a house, then a bigger house,… The truth is, we are having desires because we are imperfection and moving to perfection.

What will happen one day you have got everything that you want and need? What is next? Is there any purpose in life?  Any direction? I have heard from a friend long time ago. She said she had no more purpose in her life and felt empty in side. She graduated, going back to work and getting married with her wonderful boyfriend. That time I thought she was so cool!! Some years back, I had the same experience, I finished my studies and get paid to travel around the world and I asked myself ‘What else do I want?’ my mind came blank at that time. I thought I would have peace of mind for the rest of my life… Now that I learned, I was just having a break and then move again and create more desires along the way.

Now we learned that we never stop creating desires and having this imperfection moving to perfection. Why not we take every second counts and enjoy every moment that we have, GO WITH THE FLOW while letting things unfold for us. The true joy of sense of achievement is making things happen, not so much after we have achieved it. Just like a gold metal winners in the Olympic, so much joy in seeing things happened and have a break to flash back how s/he had achieved it with recognition, then would want to break more record or train more out standing athletes in the future…. The desires are never stop.

LIVE AND FOCUS THE PRESENT MOMENT & SMELL THE ROSSES AS YOU STROLL…

Focus

28 August

“DON’T THINK OF A PINK ELEPHANT, DON’T THINK OF HER AT ALL! SHE IS DANCING IN THE GARDEN, PLEASE DON’T THINK OF HER”

Remember in the last e-mail we talk about your unconscious mind does not process negativity. That is a very good example that even the ‘don’t’ is there, yet we still have the picture in mind that a pink elephant dancing in the garden.

You attract things that not only what you want in life, you attract things that you don’t want too e.g. diseases, financial difficulties, … That is why, we notice some people can be very careful and conscious to stay healthy, yet they diagnose with diseases, or one who is always run short of money even though s/he is very thrifty. Same goes to groups who always have ‘bad luck’ in certain areas like having demanding customers, missing wallet, demanding bosses even they have changed job, ... THIS IS THE LAW, THE UNIVERSE WORKS AND GIVES YOU THINGS THAT YOU HAVE IN MIND.

Successful people always have very calm behavior rather than worrisome. They just focus on what they want and work on it. And bunch who are ‘Happy go Lucky’, they always seems oblivious. All these people know in side them that everything will fall in place.

In order to manifest our desire, we ONLY FOCUS ON THINGS THAT WE WANT AND WORK ON IT. Some may find it hard to start with. Whenever you notice you are worrying an issue, just say to yourself, ‘Dear unconscious mind, this is not what I want, thank you’ then focus on what you desire and change the picture in your mind. Hahaha… it is good to daydreaming.

The unconscious mind II

13 August 2008

Your unconscious mind works on…

When you meet someone, especially in overseas, the person tells you s/he is from your hometown. Automatically, you feel warmth in side (your unconscious mind) and want to know more about that person. Same goes to people who meet others with same hobby, related job, went to same school,… Similarly, when you meet someone new who reminds you of somebody that you like or dislike, you will probably have about the same feeling towards the person at the beginning. It applicable to colors, buildings, voices, cars,….  that you see. You make association with a picture in your mind ‘That look like…’

When you have the time, just think back when your were a primary student, then grew up to secondary, your first job, second job, present moment, then your future like two days later, three years later and so on. You realize that your past and future actually represent a line in relation to your body. There is always a direction of past, a point at present moment (that’s where you are) and the other direction is your future.

When you think of someone you dislike, you normally can feel the negative emotion in side you. On the other hand, your breathing will slow down and feel at ease when think of someone you like. All of us repress our negative emotions e.g. sadness, anger, guilt,… Unless you have made rational decision to release these negative emotions, our unconscious mind helps us to repress our unresolved negative emotions in order to move forward. Of course, some of us like to feel more alive by bringing it back frequently or consciously make the pain more vivid.

It may be hard to accept, but it is true. Your unconscious mind does not know what is good or bad for you. If not there would not be war, diseases and turbulence in life.

Meditation does help you to float above difficult situations gradually and have smooth sail in life. They are more tools and techniques other than meditation to sand off all the bumps on road in quicker ways that I have learned and experienced. 

The unconscious mind I

29 July 2008

Unconscious mind works on…

As mentioned in the previous e-mail, the unconscious mind heals your wounds and illnesses. Notice that most of the times when you are sick e.g. cough, fever,… or you have a cut, you know what to do and let it heal by itself. Of course most of us couldn’t bear the discomfort and take medicine to fasten the process of healing. If we really leave our illness alone without aggravate it, you know yourself, your unconscious mind, will heal you.

Your unconscious mind has a blueprint to run your body to perfect health. It works day and night of making sure your breathing, heartbeat, blood flow,…  working even when you are asleep.

When you are sick, someone uses her palm to touch your forehead, that reminds you of your mother or someone at home who took care of you when you were young. Your unconscious mind stores all the memories in your body. E.g. old songs bring back your memory, taste or smell of food reminds about your mum’s cooking, certain way of touch or voice that reminds you of someone….

Your unconscious mind organizes all your memories in a chain of event. Things happen by steps or in relation of time.

All of us experienced using unconscious mind especially when mastering a skill. E.g. learning to play piano. First few times when you learn, you use so much of your conscious mind to play a piece of music. Slowly, the more you practice, the more the unconscious mind takes over. Like you know which and where your fingers should go next when playing the music.

Relax and calm (meditation) is the way to communicate with your unconscious mind. Many of us experienced that during an exam, we had this ‘I studied it before, but I can’t remember the answer!’ That was when we were at a very tense state. Then all the answers appeared in your mind once you stepped out of the exam hall, that was when you were very relax and calm. That is the reason why we encourage being relaxed and sleeping well before an exam.

Same goes for your self healing process. All you need is to have enough rest and your body will recuperate by itself when you are sick. And meditation helps to energize your body, which is when merging your conscious and unconscious mind. That is why to some, short 15 – 20 minutes ‘power nap’ (meditation) is so essential for them to reenergized for the long day.

I encourage you to MEDITATE WHENEVER IS POSSIBLE and CLEAR YOUR MIND WITH FREE OF THOUGHT.