Respect for the other person’s model of the world

“How are you today? Feeling good? Have you taken you meal…” The boss of the laundry shop spoke to the little dog in front of his own unit. Where there was a luxury car parked in front and the customer sent in a few pieces of expensive clothes for laundry with his pet (the dog) in side the car.

The old man in the car obviously a regular customer to the laundry shop. Once the car parked in front of the unit, the boss automatically stepped out to receive the clothes for laundry and have small chat with both, the old man and his pet.

This boss is someone came from China not long ago. Due to his hard work and excellent PR skill, he is able to build his business successfully in a very short time after he migrated to San Francisco, U.S.A

He is really doing, what the Chinese phrase direct translation: Speaks human language when he meets a human, and speaks spirit language when he meets a spirit. He respects and welcomes all who come to him without judgment, and even he would not ignore a little dog in front of him.

Yes, you may say, he is good in bringing in sales to his business. What he is doing is what good sales personnel could do. But not to forget, almost all customers nowadays could feel whether your service is sincere, honest and comes from the heart. What’s more, we are always pampered with choices in the market.

In fact, all of us are very good at it. Like the way we speak to children is always loving and forgiving. We draw the picture of the fantasy world while talking to them. And when we talk to an old lady, we speak to them with respect and caring tone of voice.

We are very good at that.

By the time we come home. When we face our partner, spouse, children, parents and siblings at home. That’s a whole different story. We expect people around us follow what we believe. From cleanliness, religion, behavior, value and believe system.

The marriage and birth certificates seems like the certificates that we own the person for life and expect s/he to follow what we believe in.

Some of us may be unknowingly doing it unconsciously. It is very common among the Asians. The inner connection has become wider with tasks and roles in place with expectation at home.

Stress from work and pressured from time has evidently affected the relationship with children at home too. To many, the most effective way is to ‘control’ them…. Not to carry the baby once s/he cries, big boy do not cry, just frighten the child with canning and venting out with screaming would be the fastest way… to discipline a child.

Well, if one thinks that his or her way of doing thing is the best then, we could ‘clone’ another to keep the company for life. That would be no issue of differences, disappointment, or even perceive of making mistake in daily activities.

Hmm…However, in Chinese saying ‘If I was born with a special skill in life, it is definitely serve the humanity widely. That must be a use of it in this planet.’

Respect every profession is contributing to the society in it’s own way.

Respect every difference in behavior that the person has is her unique way to reach her own destination.

Respect every forgetfulness event happens of a person is the journey for the person to make.

Respect every perceived incompetence of a person, it’s just the person has got some other gifts to contribute in the team.

Respect every mistake that the person make is a lesson for the person to learn.

Respect every negative emotion (anger, sadness, guilt,…) the person has is to make the person to be responsible and take charge of his purpose in life.

Respect every individual has got his own speed to learn lessons and own pace to move forward.

Respect every failure that the person is facing is an opportunity for the person to break through to have the successful outcome.

Sometimes we may want our love ones to speed up the process of getting out of the box of self-inflicted conflict. The thing is the person has not learned the lesson and he never be able to see the box that he is having.

What we can do to help others is to respect the person in where he is now, and have the PATIENT to LEAD him out to where he could be.

Respect the differences that we have….

Respect for the other person’s model of the world….

One of the presuppositions of NLP